British Guy by Karen Kelsey

He has lived with that Californian
for twenty years; the one who attempts
to serve him microwaved tea

and rolls her eyes when he refuses
to eat dinner and dessert with the same fork.
She holds her breath while spreading

Marmite on toast and still places fruit
with savory dishes. I've even seen her fish
an ice cube from his glass

with her fingers. She refuses to make
fried bread and several times a week
forgets to warm his dinner plate.

I am told she won't even taste
Branston Pickle! If it wasn't for the way
she adores his accent--he'd be gone.

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